What Are the Best Beef Hot Dogs That Aren't Too Salty

For this prestigious and long-awaited taste test, we invited the gruesome twosome, Mythical Kitchen's own Laverne and Shirley and the hosts of the Webby-winning A Hot Dog Is a Sandwich podcast, Josh Scherer and Nicole Enayati. Nicole, of course, ate her hot dogs like a distinguished human being, and Josh, well, we've all seen Josh eat. This was a lot like letting a feral animal loose in an alley full of garbage cans.

For this taste test, I cooked the hot dogs in a pan to get a nice sear, then added a little bit of water into the pan to finish the cooking. This, in my opinion, cooks the hot dogs thoroughly while adding a bit more texture than purely microwaving them or boiling them in water. We looked for three things in a good hot dog: snap, flavor, and size. Ideally, a good hot dog casing adds some extra texture. Being loaded full of spices isn't always a plus, but if it adds to the overall experience without taking away from the beefiness, we liked spice. Finally, the size: Hot dogs should fit inside of a standard hot dog bun comfortably, perhaps even extending past the bun just a touch. We don't want more bun than dog, ya feel me?

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Best of the Best

Hebrew National Beef Franks

Hebrew National's dog is salty and meaty, and its girth (sorry) is absolutely perfect. It doesn't have a huge amount of snap, but it's got enough so you can still tell it's made with a natural casing. The biggest score, though, is the spice blend. Hebrew National is dense with wonderful flavor. Salt, spice, garlic powder, and paprika combine to create a juicy bite of beef that's so good the hot dog starts to flavor the hot dog bun itself with its deliciously spiced beef juices. "This absolutely rules," said Josh as he shoved half a hot dog in his mouth, getting mustard all over his face.

Sauerkraut, ketchup, mustard, diced pickles—everything compliments a Hebrew National hot dog. Some people think plain hot dogs are an abomination, but once you try a juicy Hebrew National hot dog, you immediately reject that notion. Maybe the snap could be better, but it's damn near a perfect hot dog.

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Amazon

Best Big Hot Dog

Kirkland Signature Beef Hot Dogs

These are gigantic hot dogs and they are absolutely wonderful. Every single one of us liked them. Kirkland hot dogs are triple the size of a normal hot dog and triple the taste, as well. "I thought I liked discreet hot dogs, but turns out I don't," said Josh. "This is so [redacted] delicious," he continued. "Salty, beefy, and a great snap." I absolutely love how egregiously thick these hot dogs are. Something about it feels like Texas State Fair food and I'm in love with the meatiness of these big boys. I like how they protrude from both sides of the hot dog bun, so your first bite of the hot dog is just a giant hunk of salty, well-spiced meat. Kirkland hot dogs can hold a lot of toppings, too. Load this up with onions, ketchup, relish, cheese sauce and chili, whatever. The Kirkland hot dog can withstand any amount of pressure. This is a whole damn meal. A dinner dog.

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Instacart

Best Snap

Boar's Head Beef Frankfurters

This might be too fancy for some; Boar's Head hot dogs come wrapped together like links of sausage hanging in a butcher shop. The taste and texture, though, is incredible. "The snap is so inviting," said Nicole. "This feels like a person made this," said Josh, "Which is impressive because most hot dogs feel like they were made by a Tesla machine." Boar's head hot dogs have some extra spice and flavor, but they still maintain the true I-don't-actually-know-what-this-is spirit of a hot dog. It's got a great, natural flavor and a hard snap that plays well with a soft, squishy hot dog bun. The length is great, too, so your first bite won't be mostly bread. "I'm actually going to finish this," said Josh.

Here at Sporked, we don't daintily spit out food when we do taste tests. We eat.

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Instacart

Best Spice

Simply Nature Uncured Beef Hot Dogs

"What is this flavor?" asked Nicole with curious delight. Simply Nature features a slew of organic ingredients like organic onion powder, garlic powder, white pepper, paprika, and celery powder. Simply Nature hot dogs are beefy but have a uniquely pronounced taste due to the added spices. The only knock on these hot dogs is that they might be a little too taut, a bit too tightly wound, instead of loose and juicy. Josh also rolled his eyes at the organic branding of these hot dogs. "I want you to spit in the eye of science and give me a hot dog," he said. I don't disagree, but hey, flavor is flavor.

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Aldi

Best Gourmet Hot Dog

Whole Foods 365 Uncured Beef Hot Dogs

"Oooh, it's a loosey," said an excited Josh as he bit into this dog. Unlike Simply Nature, Whole Foods hot dogs are loose and deliciously tender. The skin on the Whole Foods hot dogs have a great texture that creates an added barrier. "I want more boundaries in my life and barriers in my hot dogs," said Josh. Nicole, however, thought that the skin was too tough and reminded her of the rings around bologna. It's a lot of spice for a hot dog, so it borders on gourmet territory. But I love gourmet hot dogs. Load me up with fancy fixings and charge $9. There's a ton of flavor potential here. This should inspire you to get creative in the kitchen.

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Amazon

Best Classic

Oscar Mayer Original Uncured Wieners

It's a classic. Also, this whole time I thought it was spelled Oscar Meyer. Not Oscar Mayer like John Mayer. Anyway, Oscar Mayer is squishy, spongey, salty, and has that classic hot dog taste. "It tastes like it's been pickled," said Nicole. There is a bit of piquancy to an Oscar Mayer hot dog that sets it apart from other cheap, casingless hot dogs. Personally, I love Oscar Mayer hot dogs for their ability to meld into other dishes. Cut them up and put them into mac and cheese or do what South Texas does: Cook them with scrambled eggs and stuff it all inside a taco.

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Amazon

Best for a Cookout

Nathan's Skinless Bun Length Beef Franks

Nathan's has a good snap to it and it's well balanced and tasty all around. It can taste just a tad bit rubbery, but I think that's okay in a hot dog. You definitely want to grill a Nathan's hot dog to get the most out of it both in terms of flavor and texture. The dogs themselves are sizable, and the flavor is good without being overpowering. I like Nathan's, and think that their combination of size and agreeable flavor make them a great choice for any cookout (or hot dog eating contest, obviously).

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Amazon

Best Turkey

Foster Farms Turkey Franks

Staff writer Jordan Myrick fought hard for this one. I get what Jordan likes about it, and a turkey option is never a horrible thing to have on hand for those who don't eat beef or pork. "To me this tastes good," said Jordan. "It's savory, not dry, and has a great, meaty flavor." I was a fan of Foster Farms' turkey breakfast sausage and Jordan likes their turkey dogs. Foster Farms just does turkey products very well.

Credit: Sarah Demonteverde / Target

Rhett & Link's Pick

Wagyu Beef Hot Dog from Snake River Farms

During a Good Mythical Morning blind taste test, Rhett got fancy with his pick, ya'll. "For people who have class, like me, you can get a wagyu beef hot dog from Snake River Farms," he said half jokingly. In the end, they both agreed that the Snake River Farms hot dog had a great snap and incredible flavor. Link argued that it's got too pure of a flavor for a hot dog (he prefers mechanically separated). But, there's a place for fancy food sometimes. Case in point: Snake River Farms wagyu beef hot dogs.

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